an integrative approach to working with infidelity
The prevalence of infidelity within relationships is difficult to define due to the multiple different definitions of infidelity. Based on the research, anywhere from 15-70% of couples experience infidelity within their relationship; however, what they consider to be infidelity differs (Hertlein et al., 2005).
Infidelity can have a traumatic impact on individuals and relationships, and therefore requires a comprehensive approach to address the complex emotional and relational issues that arise.
3-Stage Intervention Model:
During the initial crisis phase, the therapist focuses on stabilizing the couple's emotional state and ensuring their safety. This may involve individual therapy sessions to help the betrayed partner process their emotions, as well as couples therapy sessions to address the immediate impact of the infidelity on the relationship.
The middle phase of the intervention entails exploring the underlying issues that contributed to the infidelity. A key component of this phase of treatment involves rebuilding trust in the relationship. This stage may involve identifying and addressing unmet needs within the relationship, developing new communication skills, and exploring patterns of behaviors that may have contributed to the infidelity.
The final recovery phase focuses on sustaining the progress made in the earlier stages and promoting continued growth and healing in the relationship. This may involve ongoing individual and couples therapy, as well as developing a plan for preventing future infidelity.
Infidelity is difficult to talk about. However, the research points towards the prevalence of infidelity in relationships and a need for a safe space for individuals and couples to open up about their experiences. An integrative approach to working with infidelity offers couples hope for working through any type of infidelity that may come up in a relationship. If you are interested in learning more about working with infidelity in couples therapy, or if you are in need of support, book an appointment today!
References:
Hertlein, Wetchler, & Piercy (2005). Infidelity, Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy, 4:2-3, 5-16, DOI: 10.1300/J398v04n02_02
If you want to learn more about infidelity I highly recommend reading Esther Perel's book that re-examines a new way to think about affairs.
